This past week every asshole wannabe Macklemore out there who wants to show the world how progressive they are has been going out of their way to praise two asshole parents who used their five year old daughter for personal gain because she said she was a boy. Ya got that? This is a real fucking story, and if you’re an idiot you’ll label me as a dooshnozzle for pointing out that this story isn’t beautiful or inspiring, it’s self-centered and narcissistic. The video below is being hailed by morons as “a profile in courage.” Watch it and form your own opinion.
First of all, it takes a special kind of asshole to name their kid Ryland. What kind of hybrid name is that? It’s like they were grooming this kid to be gender neutral from day one. You tell me your name is Ryland and I have no idea if you’re a boy or a girl, which is apparently exactly what they wanted for their daughter.
One of the first things that the video says is that in 2007 Hillary and Jeff Whittington were told they would birth to a baby girl. Obviously this was a giant fucking conspiracy on the part of the doctors and nurses at the hospital. They told them they were having a girl, but obviously that was a lie. Sure the baby lacked a dinky-doodle and a Y chromosome, but that doesn’t matter.
Ya see, the baby didn’t DECLARE what gender it is yet, therefore the doctors should’ve kept their bigoted mouths shut. See what they should’ve done is wait at least five years for the baby to figure out what the fuck gender it wants to be. As a matter of fact we should have national gender signing day like high school athletes do when they announce where they’re gonna go to college.
Obviously everything I just said is moronic. But if we’re gonna be consistent here then we should do that. Why assign gender at birth? Newborn babies shit and cry. They can’t speak yet so how else could we know what gender they are? That’s essentially what the parents did here. They thought their daughter was a girl until the kid could speak. And then they believed every fucking word out of the kid’s mouth. Because that’s what rational people do – rational people listen to delusional ramblings of five year olds.
You know why we’re really careful to watch our kids when we take them out in public? Because the second you turn around they will get eaten by a wolf. Because that’s what kids do. It’s science. They do dumb, dumb things so you constantly have to keep an eye on them. It is your job as a parent to make sure they don’t get eaten by a wolf. You do that by encouraging free thinking while offering guidance along the way. That’s because kids are not rational human beings yet. They believe a fat bastard named Santa brings every kid on earth presents once a year because they’re not smart enough to realize that this is not logistically possible. If they ever meet some kid from the Congo they’d likely laugh out loud about this “Santa” guy.
But we humor them because we’re smarter than them. We know that one day we’ll have to break the truth to them though. But not these two idiots. Jeff and Hillary Whittington aren’t heroes, and they’re certainly not brave. They’re just lazy. Their daughter said she was a boy. If they insisted that she was not then she’d cry about it and get mad at them. You know, like kids do.
You know how I can tell they’re lazy? From this quote in the video:
“Some people say it was just a phase. Phases end.”
Right. Because a two year old doesn’t know what the fuck they’re talking about, but a five year old does. AKA, we got tired of fighting it and realized it was much easier for us to give her a haircut and some boy’s clothing. Now we can go back to making a fortune selling houses in San Diego.
But they obviously didn’t wanna deal with that because it’s a lot easier to just tell the kid they’re something they’re not. The difference between lying to their kid about this, and lying to them about Santa, is that this will one day require genital mutilation. Instead of calling these people selfish assholes like they are, morons on Twitter and Facebook are predictably praising them. Look at these nudniks:
Yea Ryland is very amazing. She’s the first girl to ever think she’s something that she’s not. The next time a little girl says she’s a princess we’re gonna pawn her off on a Saudi Arabian Prince. Because everything that little kids say is real. Everything.
Yea they’re so strong. Because when I think of strength I think of two assholes who exploit their child in order to win the Harvey Milk Award for tolerance. Sure they could’ve insisted to their daughter that she was in fact a boy, but that would lead to a fight. And strong parents always give their kids everything they want. Because kids are always right.
Supportive. Yea that’s the word. Like when a kid says they’re an astronaut the first thing a supportive parent does is put them in a fucking spaceship.
That’s because you’re a dumbass hun.
Yea, every single thing a kid says is rational. Their brains are completely developed and it’s really, really responsible of adults to take everything they say seriously. Thank God those parents didn’t dismiss or belittle their obviously very confused child. That wouldn’t be very TOLERANT now would it?
One of my biggest beefs with the “LBGTQ” thing, is that it’s a noble cause that’s been hijacked. Lesbian and gay people have almost nothing in common with “transgender” people, but yet they’ve all been lumped into one acronym like they’re all some sort of lepers that need to bond together. It’s demeaning to gay people. Gay does not mean transgender. Transgender does not mean gay.
For example, we all accept the fact that right wing lunatics who want to convert gay people to heterosexuality are insane right? Because you can’t choose who you’re attracted to. So if you’re a girl who is attracted to other girls then you’re a lesbian right? But if you then realize that you’re actually a boy and you switch genders then you’re still attracted to girls, correct? So didn’t you just turn yourself straight then? I’m dizzy now.
And I love how the parents were convinced because their daughter started wearing boys clothes and cutting her hair short. So what I’m wondering is, where did this little girl buy all her little boy suits? And how did she become such a distinguished barber? Because SHE chose to put those clothes on and cut her hair right? Oh wait, you mean four year olds don’t have the means to do that? Oh. I guess that means Mom and Dad did it? So the kid didn’t really choose to do this then? Mom and Dad did? Got it. You know what I wore when I was four and five years old? Really fucking embarrassing outfits. Because I didn’t buy them. My parents did.
Kids say they’re stuff all the time. But according to these two asshole parents the kids are always right. If a two year old says he’s Superman then letting him dress up as Superman for Halloween isn’t enough. A “brave” parent throws their kid out of a fucking window and let’s him fly away. Because he said he’s fucking Superman right? Yea that makes sense.
Same thing happened here. The parents were irresponsible enough to take the tomfoolery coming out of their daughter’s mouth seriously. The took it SO seriously that they allowed their daughter to “become a boy.” According to the video that meant calling her, “him” and painting his room blue. Because now that she’s a boy, gender norms like that are real things.
What the parents didn’t talk about was whether or not their girl was still a girl. Because if she still sits down to go to the bathroom, then she’s still a she. I really, really, really hope all they did was change her sheets and give her a haircut. Because if they went one step further they should be put in jail for the rest of their lives. After all, there’s no going back from that. What happens if Ryland changes her mind three years from now? You know, like kids fucking do all the time. One day I was a professional football player. The next year I was a wrestler. Then I was back to being an astronaut again.
I’m sure some people will read this and say, “Man, that Reginald McDooshnozzle sure is insensitive for being so mean to these wonderful and loving parents. How can you blog about a six year old? That’s so inappropriate.” Newsflash to all of your ilk: They PUT this on Youtube. It’s gotten 6 million hits in a couple days. They are attention seeking whores who want you to pat them on the back. They used their kid in order to bring fame upon themselves. They live in one of the most liberal states in the country (CA) and the work in real estate, so very likely this will be good for business. Here’s their website. On there they actually say this:
Upon the birth of her son, Ryland, Hillary took time away from her professional career to raise her child.
Ummmm, Hillary didn’t give birth to a son. She gave birth to a daughter who she is encouraging to genitally mutilate herself into a son. But we won’t mention that. And by now everyone in San Diego knows who you are and what you did, and probably most of them think you’re heroes, because most of them of are morons too. And because you’ve gone out of your way to use your daughter as a prop to become famous you’re probably gonna sell a lot more homes now. So congrats on the enormity of your success. Fuck your daughter though right?
I’ve seen some supporters of this family say that gender and sex are two completely different things. Gender is a state of mind. Sex is a phenotype. So theoretically you could be a girl with boy parts and vice versa. And since this is DEFINITELY a real thing, that should mean all of these people are cool with their daughters changing in a locker room in front of a boy who identifies as a girl right? Because that’s really, really responsible parenting.
And did the parents ever for one second think that maybe the kid doesn’t wanna grow up the rest of their lives and be the transgendered kid from youtube? Because realistically they could’ve done this and I would have no fucking clue who Ryland Whittington is. She (or he) could’ve lived their life in peace and tranquility out in San Diego. But instead Ryland Whittington will have a Wikipedia page by the end of the week. Whenever she googles her name this story will come up. But, fuck her thought right? It takes a special kind of asshole to go out of their way to put their six year old out there for every person in the world to see. Because when she’s 12 she’s gonna appreciate going online and reading all the lovely things people are sure to say about her.
The tolerance crowd will be the first to tell you that a boy who thinks he’s a girl should be able to use the girl’s bathroom at school. Because tolerance. But how would these same people feel if a male teacher suddenly realized that they were a woman in a man’s body and wanted to start using the girl’s locker room? I’m sure they’d be cool with Mr. McDooshnozzle watching their daughters in various forms of dress right? Because tolerance.
So that’s America in a nutshell right there people. A bunch of “progressives” are patting these two asshole parents for abusing their child. Because tolerance.
People like us are the bad guys right now because the tolerance crowd will call you a bigot for using common sense. Send these people a message by sharing this on Facebook or wherever else you go to let them know that there are millions who actually still have a fucking brain.
Share your thoughts to keep the conversation going.